I am officially at the end of my fucken tether.
I have had it up to my fucken eyeballs with everyone else's shit.
I really feel like lying down on the floor and crying until I die.
I am in the middle of packing the whole house myself, and cleaning it myself. I find out that Mum and Dad have not gotten around to some things with the new house.
eg
No curtains
No fire installed
No shelves in pantry
No Letter fucken box
No phone line into the property
I know my father and know he is a procrastinator and I also know that he is extremely busy at the moment, working 7 days a week as a consulting engineer. But for fuck's sake, if you are going to ask us to move into your property at least do the flipping basics, so that my husband isn't going to go off his fucken tree at me about the lack of them!!!
And I just keep getting the whole "you are getting a brand new house to rent for a hundred less than you'd get it on the market". Yes, I know but I also have to put up with my parents as landlord's and I also have to put up with the "rules" and I also have to put up with all the day to day shit of living in your property so get the fuck over yourself and sort it out.
I have two days left, Blair is away until Friday night with work, Phoebe has glandular fever so the girls can't go to preschool on their allocated days, I have two toddlers in my flipping face and I can't get a fucken thing done.
I have the most intense feeling of depression I've had for a while. And all this comes after the weekend from hell with Blair and I on verge of separating with issues beyond us.
I need alcohol I.V. administered STAT
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38 comments:
I know words cant help right now but am really sorry that things are so shite.
I wish i was in NZ to give you a BIG HUG & to help you pack (or look after the kidlets).
(((((Cyber Hugs)))))
Renting with family is not ideal.
We were warned against it.
I can see why now.
Good luck Jules. Hopefully once you are in and unpacked, things will start to look a little brighter.
x
Vent! That's what we're here for!
Moving house is up there at the top in the stress stakes, as I'm sure you already know. And I'd be round with the van to help if I was just a bit closer.
Love. :¬)
Hi Jules,
I'm sorry to hear that things are in a very shitty way there. I really wish I could help you love but even kind words seem empty, meaningless and not having any fucking point. So I'll tell you a joke in the hope that I can make you smile.
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.
Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "Business trip or pleasure?"
She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?"
"Lecturer" she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."
"Really?" he said. "And what kind of myths are there?"
"Well" she explained, "One popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait.
Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best.
I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."
Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry" she said, "Here I am discussing all of this with you and I don't even know your name."
"Tonto" the man said, " Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."
Hope you're feeling better soon Jules.
U
There is nothing I can say!
Get the alcohol and drown yourself in it?
Start screaming till someone helps you?
Tell your parents it ain't gunna work and find somewhere else?
None of that will work eh?
Big hole... only way is up.... try to hang in there.. everything may look better NEXT WEEK!
Breathe baby, breathe!
Sending you loads of love and hugs down the line. If I was there I'd be over in a shot!!
xoxoxoxoxo
Hang in there babe!, this time next week things will be looking up. Just do what you have to do to get through it. If that means a glass/bottle of wine...so be it. Thinking of you xx
Go for whatever strikes your fancy
"Be Drunk
by Charles Baudelaire
Translated by Louis Simpson
You have to be always drunk. That's all there is to it—it's the only way. So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks your back and bends you to the earth, you have to be continually drunk.
But on what? Wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But be drunk.
And if sometimes, on the steps of a palace or the green grass of a ditch, in the mournful solitude of your room, you wake again, drunkenness already diminishing or gone, ask the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, everything that is flying, everything that is groaning, everything that is rolling, everything that is singing, everything that is speaking. . .ask what time it is and wind, wave, star, bird, clock will answer you: "It is time to be drunk! So as not to be the martyred slaves of time, be drunk, be continually drunk! On wine, on poetry or on virtue as you wish."
The stress of moving house apparently is the 2nd highest we endure - the 1st being death. I really do know how you're feeling hon & after nearly 40 (fucking) house moves, this last one had me reduced to tears & using language which I have never, ever used before. (and being dragged up in the construction industry, my language has always been 'colourful' *coff*)
Having said that darlin' you WILL survive, sick kids, missing husband & unfinished house et al. Have your drink hon & take time to think back - you've been through worse Jules & you're still here to tell us about it!
If I could look after the kids & help you pack, I truly would, but instead I'm sending you some mega hugs & much strength :-)
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
Oh Jules sorry to hear it is all gone crappy for you....... have a drink if you need but then find a way to pick yourself up.... hang in there things will look up....
I am so very sorry you are feeling such depression and ickiness. I wish I could take it away for you and wish I knew how to be that magical. :)
It sounds like everything is piling up on you, having to pack for the shift, sick kids, frustrating parents & fighting with Blair - no wonder you are feeling miserable.
Deal with what you can - the rest will be fine.
Put sheets over the windows in the meantime (your parents will hate it & hopefully move faster to get you some).
It is summer - you don't need the fire at the moment.
Get your mail sent to your parents or get a PO Box in town.
Keep everything in boxes in the pantry (everytime your parents visit make sure the pantry door is open & if you have time, make it look messy - again it should annoy the crap out of them enough to fix it).
Finally if they give your the "new house cheap rent" lecture again remind them you are doing it as a favour to them so they can get it insured as it was empty for so long.
Now take a deep breath & have a strong drink :-)
Hi jules: I can offer you e-hugs and e-kisses. Once you get settled in things will be okay. :)
years from now you will be surprised what you surrived.
later sweetie xoxoxoxoxoxo
*HUGS* and you so know I'm not the hugging type! :)
Hang in there - you will sort out the little problems. Look on the bright side - new clean shiny house.
Want me to send you a letterbox? I have about 8o of them here! And, funny enough, they are from New Zealand hahha. They are lockable and secure and really nice looking. Let me know, it will be your Christmas Gift from me :)
Hopefully by now everything will have settled down a bit. Certainly by the end of the weekend.
It will get better Jules just hang in there.
Poor Phoebe, poor you. Hope she gets better real fast.
Jules I'm in the process of moving hosue too. It fully bites!!! Hope you felt better after the vent and/or alcohol!! Good luck packing!
I was lucky that when I moved it was just me and I chucked most of my stuff away! Hopefully things are starting to look up for you, you can always call on Blair's building skills and get him to to do the shelves/letterbox? Then send your parents the bill, lol... ;p
Hang in there Jules, I know you've got it in you (hugs)
Och c'mon now doll, it's nothing a wee drap of vodka and a pizza cannae cure....surely?
alcohol makes it worse baby.
i'm sorry things are not good for you. it will pass - you're superwoman and you'll get there.
xx
Egads you are having a right, royal, cunt of a time. Just take one day at a time hun and BREATHE. You're doing your best and that's enough.
Hope the move went ok and you're feeling less stressed.
And phoebe is starting to feel better.
(((((jules))))) hang in there, sugar! sometimes, you just have to take what life hands you minute by minute. but, i do know, a wee drop of courage will help calm the nerves! ;~D xoxoxo
Much love yr way... sorry I cant be more useful than that.
xx
Thinking of you and sending you love and healing energy from Colorado! You are stronger than this and you can beat it!
What I hear is you are tired, nee YOU time and don't need the stress of moving your entire family alone.
I loved Traceys solutions.
One step at a time. If anyome puts stress on you for not doing this, or not doing that - they are unreasonable to expect it of you when you have the babes home from daycare and school.
You are a super woman but you aren't Superwoman. Breathe and take baby steps.
I wish (and have clicked my heels together but my ruby slippers are cheap ones from KMart) I could magic myself there to help you in any way I could. Hell, pop the kids in a boat and send 'em to Aunty Beckie's house ;) LOL
You know this will pass.
You know that we are due a long Skype phone call with glass of wine in hand.
Love to you sugar lips.
xoxoxxo
Hi Jules... Hope your move has gone smoother than you predicted...
Only just catching up on blog commenting now. Sorry. Hope things have been improving for you! Take care of yourself xx
hope things went well in the moving department and have settled at least alittle
Felicity
Hey, how is it all going??
Are you OK & coping??
hi Babes...hope things aren't so bad now...sending you positive vibes and big hugs. Have a great Christmas xx
Thinking of you and hoping everything is okay. Have a happy christmas.
Kate
(kittie444@hotmail.com)
Hope things have settled for you and you are enjoying the new place and feeling relaxed enough to enjoy Christmas day tomorrow. Merry Christmas :-)
hi jules...I just wanted to wish wonderful things for you and your family and....
MERRY CHRISTMAS darling. XXOOO
just checking in, sugar. xoxoxoxoxxo
Hey babe, hope things are going well. Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and a fab New Years last night. Thinking of you x
You okay??? I hope so...a happy New year to you and hope things turn out as you wish for.
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
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