Dear Inventor Of Duraseal,

What the fuck were you thinking when you invented this shit??

As if mothers don't have enough time consuming tasks to complete without having to cover over 30 books with the most impractical shit ever invented.

My very recent experience (until 1.12am this morning!!) had me encounter the following issues:

1. Getting the wrapping off the duraseal, anyone would think this gold the way it's so securely cling wrapped!!

2. Then I come across the sellotape to keep the roll in roll format (as if the over zealous cling wrap wasn't enough to do this??). Is this possibly THE stickiest sellotape in the world? It nearly peeled the duraseal off it's sticky backing just trying to get it off. As I had six rolls of duraseal to open last night I could of a) not had to contend with the five mins each bit of sellotape took to take off and b) not had to contend with the sticky residue the stickiest tape in the world left on the duraseal so that I ended up having to place the name labels in bizarre places to cover these sticky anomalies!!

3) How long do these rolls actually stay rolled before being released upon the unsuspecting public?? I found it a near impossible feat to keep the fucken roll unrolled!! If I didn't lay something heavy on one end I would never haven managed to cut off any sections!!

4) Do you wankers even consider the size of exercise books when you size up these rolls?? There was always a 10 - 15 cm excess at the end of the roll, over 6 rolls that is plenty of wasted bloody duraseal that would only be able to cover books for smurfs.

5) What is with the difficulty levels in being able to actually separate the backing paper from the duraseal? Is this meant to just fuck me off, cos it does!! And then 3 times out of ten, when I peeled off the backing, it had actually taken the stickiness on the backing paper, leaving the actual duraseal as sticky satin sheets!!

6) Why the bloody hell does the duraseal ALWAYS end up with air bubbles in it??? No bloody matter how slowly and definitively I placed and rolled the books onto the duraseal I would always end up with frickin bubbles.

If you were that bloody brilliant in inventing shit you would have just approached the manufacturers of exercise books and come up with an offer to add your product to their books during production so us poor haggard mothers could just buy the bloody things all ready to go, even with name labels already on them (now that's thinking outside the square!!) and all we would have to do is write the midget's name, class and subject on each one and that would be it.

So next time you are thinking of inventing a sticky, completely user-unfriendly product, think again, or I may just go postal on your arse!!

Yours faithfully

Mrs Outspoken