Don't You Just Hate ....

..... that aunty that arrives unannounced with the worst timing ever??

You know the one, she calls in about once a month, you usually have her arrival timed quite methodically. For some reason a pimple or two, along with itchy inner ears, alerts me to her impending arrival.

But today it really did fuck me off when she arrived.

You see, my darling husband has been away all of last week, all of this week and it had been a good half week before his first departure that we'd had marital affairs.

I am gagging for a good one on one with my man.

And then, no less than 20 minutes after he arrived home, the bitch arrived, waving her hand at me throught the sliding door.

"Woohoo, it's me, I'm here to stay for a couple of days, who knows when I'll be off, and you know dear, just when you think I'm gone, I'll scare the bejebus out of you by popping back up at the kitchen window, even if all the indicators are that I left the day before".

Fucken bitch.

I'm going to need alcohol (although, for some unexplained reason, I seem to get off face much easier when she's staying).

So my rodgering is out of the question until at least next weekend.

****walks away sobbing****